In Remembrance of...

A BEGINNING NOTE

Since these blog posts will be turned into at least one book, I decided to start Kara's story like a book. Here are the first couple of pages:

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Working Title of Blog Post Series and Book:

"Moments with Kara: What a feral cancer cat taught me about faith and life"

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DEDICATION

Kara, our Baby Girl and Little Bit, you will never be forgotten, our faithful and loyal friend and companion. Your strength and love will inspire us to live better lives and be better people as we wait to see you again in eternity. You never let even their cancer hold you back or get you down and allowed love to help you be steadfast. 

What an inspiration you were and are. Your resiliency was absolutely remarkable.

Snuggle up to the Lord for us.

ONCE UPON A TIME

There once was a cat. Her name was Kara.

This is the story of a merging of lives and this is the tale of our journey together.

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A LED MEMORIAL CANDLE SHINES 

I am a writer of nonfiction and fiction and am a journal keeper. Therefore, I have an office in one of the bedrooms of our home. It's devoted to writing and reading and has no bed in it, unless you count our bald faced eagle's sighed, where he is now, sleeping away. This is where I sit now and I have a round pedestal table, which I use as a desk. On this desk sits a LED tealight candle in remembrance of Kara Duplease.

It is a flameless LED candle since I cannot have regular candles because our other cat, Sinan (pronounced see-nawn), a crazy and woolly Maine Coon who caught his tail on fire once when he jumped on my desk to get in the way of my writing. He was and is just fine. I will share the story another time, but this is why I don't use a real candle to stand as a memorial of our Baby Girl.

Every time I write at my desk, or at the sofa downstairs, I make sure to light it and remember our feral cancer cat who thoroughly stole our hearts. It is the least I can do. 

OUR BABY GIRL

It has been sixteen days since my husband and I made the choice to have Kara put to sleep. 

Pardon me as I pause for a moment and try to recollect myself as just writing that sentence has stirred up several emotions, never mind memories. 

Here it is Fall, and my favorite time of year, I am reminded as I look out my window and see the yellow, orange, and red leaves of trees in the distance. And that flashes an image in my mind of when Kara found us, how it was Fall and I have a couple of pictures of the feral cat with colorful Fall leaves beside her. She made Fall my favorite season all the more because it brought her into our lives. 

It was just over a year ago.

Kara stepped into our open garage, and into the lives of my husband and me, in the Fall. And, she stepped out of our physical lives just one year, six days later, and she has so thoroughly changed us that her story must be told. It must be remembered and shared. 

Oh, what a year!

When Kara stepped into our garage and into our lives, it was after my husband and I found out we were both infertile, after we tried two rounds of IVF, and tried to adopt... and we had just made the decision to not have children. 

We thought she was a feral kitten with how small and malnourished she was, only to find out by our veterinarian how she was a senior on one visit, and only to find out on another she had both breast and lung cancer. Therefore, we decided to spoil her rotten and love on her as long as we could, in a way we knew she had never been loved. 

Those last two paragraphs were a teaser as to the rest of this blog and book. I hope you now understand more of the context in which she came into our lives. And, I hope you see when we call her our Baby Girl, she was just that. She was probably the closest thing we will ever have to one and we loved her with our whole being and spent great resources (time and money) as we tried to give her at least some time of the life she deserved. She sure hadn't deserved being beaten and abandoned (I will write more on that, too). 

Kara never knew before us the kind of love we gave her and we didn't know the kind of love she gave us.

Yes, Baby Girl... This Blog and book are in remembrance of you.

What are you afraid of losing?: A journaling exercise or prompt

If you could foresee these tragedies somehow... And if you were to be hit in the head and were to suffer from amnesia, or if you suffered from dementia or Alzheimer's... What are the things you would want in your journal so that they were not lost forever?

These might seem off the wall. But, thousands experience these things each day.

Count Your Blessings: A Journaling Prompt and Exercise

Count at least 25 blessings of your past.

Count at least 25 blessings of your future.

Then, make a list of the memories they reminded you of. Then, you will have more memories captured on the page you can turn back to later and journal about.

It's in the small details you find the most meaning

As you journal and/or write your story (your memoir), you start by writing the facts of a memory. you write a report like a reporter of just the facts, ma'am. This is the best way to start.

Then, you ask: who, what, where, when. why, how, and what-if questions and answer the endless possibilities.

Next, you add the five senses of: sight, sound, smell, touch, and taste.

Finally, you look at the finer, smaller details, more minute--like the sight of Granny's gravy boat--what it looked like, what it meant, and how you have a gravy bowl you use, but it always makes you think of Granny's--and of her--and how much she meant and means to you. 

It's those smaller details that go to the heart of the matter--and the heart of our story. 

These are the memory snapshots. These are the memories we mine and we find the msot valuable treasure in these details and in these memories. 

Look at the smaller details in your journaling. This is when you are finally writing deeply. This is where your true exploration begins. This is what you include in your memoir. This is what you should journal most about. 

But, it takes all of those other steps to get to the heart of the matter. 

These smaller details mean the most and are what will capture your reader's attention mroe than than anything. they also define who you are and what makes you who you are and what make you tick. 

The smaller, finer details are what mean the most. 

It's in the small details you find the most meaning. 

~ Stacy Duplease

Journalkeeper & Memoir Writer

2013 and January Journaling and Memoir Writing Classes Notes

As you might have guessed, the homework for last week and this week have their purposes. Last week's homework was meant to get you to write the top 125 memories from your life  that came to your mind. This week, you are fleshing out 5-7 memories and writing as much as you can about each.

Are these classes nothing but busy work and homework? You might wonder. 

But, I bet you see at this point that there might be a method to my madness. There is one. Trust me. Today, I wills tart to explain a little of what that is,

Journaling is very personal--and so are your memories. My whole goal is to help give yourself the permission to experiment and get these things down on the page, so you can leave your legacy and start to write your memoir. I have provided some guidance with the homework, but I've left a lot of it up to you. Why? It's because you need to experiment and figure out what works for you. You need to feel free when you journal--and not have so much instruction that it stifles your creativity or your flow. 

That being said, if you were too lost or stifled, I was sure you would contact me and request help--or search my blog for more tools to help you--of which there are plenty. 

HABIT GROWING

I have not wanted to ask you to set a daily word count goal. That can put undue pressure on you and can stifle your muse. Therefore  I have not done so. However, can you see, this week in particular, that you are starting to write a certain number of words per day? 

You are developing the journaling habit without even realizing it. And, as to how many words per day... It you are new to journaling, I recommend 500 words or so. If you are a regular journalkeeper, I recommend 1,000. But, again  the choice is up to you. Do what works. That's the bottom line. And, make it your goal to journal a little more every week. 

If you are writing your memoir, this is really important. Make a decision as to how many words you want to write a day--and get after it. The average word count for a memoir is 80,000 to 100,000 or so words. Some are a lot more and some are less. 

PATTERNS

What comes to mind, when it comes to mind, is important. There are patterns there and reasons there you will need to explore. Are you starting to see this?

MEMOIR WRITERS

Your journal is your first draft of your memoir. 

We need to mine through our memories and then figure out the patterns  so we know how to write our memoir. We will start to see the patterns next week. Hang in there. But, your journaling is the first step that's needed. 

YOUR MEMORIES

Your memories are a key as to what has happened to you, who you were, who you are, who you will become, and where you go next in your life's journey. So, mien them deeply. Get all of them on the page, and keep writing as much as you can about each of your original 125 memories. Keep an ongoing FUTURE MEMORY JOURNALING LIST so that you can also mine those later. 

HOMEWORK

* What patterns are you starting to see?

* How has mining your memories impacted you? 

* What new memories have you uncovered as you think about other memories?

* Do you see how you became who you are today and why?

~ Stacy Duplease

Journalkeeper

Dealing with your stuff: A journaling exercise or prompt

It's important to deal with your stuff, so your stuff does not deal with you. 

So, what stuff keeps working on you, coming to mind, chasing you, tapping on your shoulder, pulling you--good or bad? (Journal your response.) 

It's important to acknowledge your stuff, so you can deal with it--so it will not deal with you. If you don't, you cannot move on. There will be no forward motion in your life. The days might go by, but you end up being stuck where you stuff first started to collect and brew. 

What do you need to deal with?

Start this today. 

~ Stacy Duplease

Journalkeeper

Memories

Memories are a gift given to us by God.

They remind us how we have lived.

The question is how well we have lived, are living, and will live. 

Our memories can help us live a better life today and tomorrow--if we mine through them and find the nuggets that show us how we got to where we are today and who we are as well. 

Stacy Duplease
Journalkeeper & Author

* My Storykeeper Odyssey in 2013: Journaling & Memoir

* The Journaling & Storykeeping Encyclopedia of 2013

The Journaling Path Blog Network: http://thejournalingpath.blogspot.com

Email: storykeeper2121@gmail.com

Bookstore: http://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/hisfiction

dba Remembering Your Present, LLC & Storykeeper 2121

My Storykeeper Odyssey in 2013: My Personal Journaling

MY FIRST MEMORIES

I remember several images from when I was to young to really understand, but can see images. 

I remember looking at my feet and being in the baby swing. 

I remember my dad bringing home diapers one night from the grocery store. He stopped off and got them on the way home from work. 

I remember my blankets (my blankeys) and my bottle.

I remember when my dad but my baby bottles into glasses. 

I remember my Golden Retriever, Sunny, begging as I ate in my highchair.

I remember Sunny as a puppy.

I remember helping my dad wash his car. 

I remember sitting in a wading pool out front of our house, drinking from my bottle.

I remember Sunny eating holes in our backyard wooden fence. 

Stacy Duplease
Journalkeeper & Author

* My Storykeeper Odyssey in 2013: Journaling & Memoir

* The Journaling & Storykeeping Encyclopedia of 2013

dba Remembering Your Present, LLC & Storykeeper 2121

Making Mistakes: A journaling exercise or prompt

Have you ever made a mistake? If so, what was it and what did you learn from it? List all of the memories associated with it. Have you dealt with it or does it still deal with you? What do you think about it today? How has it shaped you and your life today? Have you forgiven yourself for it?

Do all of the above for each mistake.

Be thorough and spend some time on this.

-- Stacy Duplease
Journalkeeper & Author

What is your life purpose?: A journaling exercise or prompt

What is your life purpose?

Do you know? If so,when and how did you find out? And, are you living it well? If not, journal and pray the answer will come.

Spend a lot of time exploring this.

Journal about this at least once a week.

-- Stacy Duplease
Journalkeeper & Author

A room by room journaling exercise or prompt

As you think of memories over the next year, there are all sorts of tricks to use to help us remember all of our past memories. After all, each of them have brought you where you are today and have made you who you are today.

Grab your journal and sit in every room in your house. Make a list of  everything,and I mean everything, you see. Once you do that, list every memory you have of each item. Then, write at least a page of each memory.

Then, think about all of the places you have lived and do the same as the above.

Then, think about other people's houses you have been in and the memories associated with the people, the rooms, and objects from each room if you can.

-- Stacy Duplease
Journalkeeper & Author

My Storykeeper Odyssey in 2013: Post #6 My Personal Journaling

The last two days of journaling three of my memories has rocked my world. It has befuddled and amazed me. I never would have expected what happened. I know I have talked a little about this in a previous post; nevertheless, I want to go more into depth at this time.

How did I choose the three memories I chose? I did one memory at a time and picked the memory to work on that spoke to me the most and grabbed my attention. Then, I started to write whatever came to mind about each memory. And that was where things grew most interesting. I wrote about one typed page total of each memory. The first paragraph or two was where I wrote just the facts. There were no surprises there. It was after that the surprises came.

I wrote things I never expected and was able to glean new insight. I cannot stress that enough. It blew me away and that is putting it mildly. I learned how each of those memories shaped the woman I am today and why I do the things I do--and never realized.

The best part was how I kept making notes to write more about a sentence later. Moreover, I never would have thought of the stuff on my own if I hadn't journaled. Also, I did not use any prompts or a memory snapshot yet on any of these memories. Therefore, realistically, I will write another two to three pages on average for each memory. I will expand more on them later for my memoir. Never
mind how I also remembered several new memories I had forgotten and added to my Future Journaling of Memories List.

My life has been changed because of these new insights. I had not recognized how much things influenced me then and now--until I journaled about it this week. This is huge. Massive. Life-altering.

A week ago I would not have imagined any of this. I was rather I intimidated by the 125 memories list and wanting to write more in-depth accounts over 2013. Now, I cannot help but think I look forward to more of the same in 2014... and that thought does not intimidate me.

How exciting!

-- Stacy Duplease
Journalkeeper & Author

Blessings Journaling

Rather than do what is called gratitude journaling, do Counting of Blessings Journaling (or Blessings Journaling). 

The difference between the two is the second recognizes what God has done in one's life, around one's life, and through one's life.

JOURNALING EXERCISE OR PROMPT FOR 2013

Count the Blessings in your life each and every day all year long in 2013. Write at least 3 each day.

Most of the blessings you count, by the way, are memories. Therefore, you might want to write more about them later. This is another way to leave your legacy.

And, just think--if you're having a rough day, you can always look at the blessings you had before and it should re-motivate you and help you find blessings on those challenging days. 

Stacy Duplease
Journalkeeper & Author

My Storykeeper Odyssey in 2013: Journaling & Memoir

Email: storykeeper2121@gmail.com

Bookstore: http://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/hisfiction

dba Remembering Your Present, LLC & Storykeeper 2121

30-Days of the Memory Launch Pad Class

30-Days of the Memory Launch Pad Class 

This is a class or seminar that I will have as a blog post series on my blog and as a series of discussion here:

Official Website: 

http://storykeeper2121.blogspot.com

Official Community: https://plus.google.com/u/0/communities/113054405863121223338

Official Description:

This is a 30-Day focus of getting as many of our memories on the page as possible.  

 IF YOU ARE INTERESTED

Sign up on the community link just listed. 

WHAT DOES THIS LOOK LIKE?

There will be a weekly blog post about what to review from the previous week and what to do this week.  

Also, at the community, there will be discussion questions and more journaling exercises or prompts.

TO GET THE MOST MEMORIES DOWN ON THE PAGE

You will also want to sign up on the community for each monthly event in 2013. This will help you get all of your memories on the page.

WEEKLY TOPICS

Week 1 Strongest Memories

Week 2 Decades

Week 3 People

Week 4 Objects & Places

This is part of the 2013 Storykeeper Odyssey Class. Nonetheless, even if you are not part of the 2013 class, you can still participate in this January class. 

2013 CALENDAR OF EVENTS AND BLOG POST SERIES

2013

This is a list of the blog post series and google+ Journaling and Storykeeping community events for all of 2013, as well as for each month of 2013:

* 2013 Storykeeper Odyssey: Writing Our Memories

* January 30-Days of the Memory Launch Pad (Lists)

* February 30-Days of Years 

* March 30-Days of Your Strongest Memories

* April 30-Days of A Healing Balm for Your Past

* May 30-Days of Focusing on Your Marriage

* June 30-Days of Focusing on Your Parents 

* July 30-Days of Objects

* August 30-Days of Focusing on Your Grandparents

* September 30-Days of Family and Friends

* October 30-Days of Places

* November 30-Days of Dreams and Goals

* December 30-Days of Future Memories and Planning

The goal of each month is to get all of our memories on the page and listed in our journals in 2013 so we can leave a legacy that's remembered in 2013 and beyond. 

The day after Christmas: Preparing for the New Year

It's the day after Christmas and I am in the process of getting back into everything--blog, google+ communities, journaling, etc. As I mentioned in the previous blog post, I even took some time off from journaling. 

Now, you need to know something. I usually do not take any time off from journaling--unless there has been some type of emergency. But, even then, I try to journal right through it. Hence, this was rare for me. It was hard. I knew what I was missing and I felt it. However, do I need to tell you how much sweeter it is to open my journal (metaphorically--since I do online journaling)?

I realize how much I needed some time off where I didn't do much of anything. I was pretty worthless and it felt great. 

We could not make it home for the holidays this year, but will be back home to Denver in the first third of 2012. Therefore, Christmas was just me and he. It was nice. We went for a drive along the Colonial Parkway and were able to see these Christmas swans:

That was a real treat and what I call a hug from God. 

Then, we started a new Christmas tradition: We watched the movie, THE SOUND OF MUSIC. 

The swans and the movie made our time very memorable for me. Then again, we also watched a couple cowboy movies and that made it memorable, too.

JOURNALING EXERCISE

So, how was your time off and Christmas? What did you do that was memorable or what happened that was memorable? 

Now, it's time for us to turn our eyes to the New Year

~ Stacy Duplease

(Image Credit: Stacy Duplease)

Memories Quote

Journaling Retreat: Stirring Up the Memories

Journaling Retreat

Well, we are about halfway through our second day of our journaling retreat. I just thought I would check in with you.

JOURNALING EXERCISE AND PROMPT:

* So, how are you really? 

* How has today's journaling retreat been for you?

* How is it for you to remember the memories--the good, the bad, the ugly, and the indifferent? 

* Has stirring up the memories been a good or tough thing? 

* What are your favorite memories that you've listed?

* What are the most powerful memories you've listed?

* What are the most life-changing memories you've listed?

* What has surprised you?

* What memory snapshots do you want to do? 

* What have you learned through writing your memory list?

* Is there anything you want to share?

* What do you want to write more about? (Which memories?)

WHAT NOW?

So, what should we do now that we are almost halfway through our day? 

* Keep doing whatever journaling prompt or style you want to associated with this memory list retreat. 

* Do some memory snapshots.

* Write a paragraph of journaling of 7 different memories.

* Write 1-page for 1 memory.

* Etc. Etc. Etc.: Do whatever you want to do. 

~ Stacy Duplease

Journaling Retreat: The Day After

Journaling Retreat

Why don't we grab our favorite beverage and some food, if we haven't done that already? Then, while we are at it, we should probably grab our journals so we can start our day of journaling.

In this case, we are on Day 2 of our Journaling Retreat. However, this blog post can be used in the future for the day after a journaling retreat. It was a retreat in which our goal is to get as many memories down on the page from our lives as possible: the good, the bad, the ugly, and the indifferent--all of them. Today, we will spend another day doing much the same. However, there will be a few differences.

Therefore, whether you have a 1-day journaling retreat or a 14 day one, this blog post will provide more information for having a journaling retreat of your own--or joining me on my planned journaling retreats. 

JOURNALING EXERCISE OR PROMPT:

* So, how did your journaling retreat go yesterday? What did you think about it?

* Did it go as well as you hoped--or not so well?

* How many pages of journaling did you get done? (But, remember  it's about quality--not quantity. I am asking this question merely as a point of reference.)

YESTERDAY

I had several thoughts yesterday as I made my memory list:

1 "Wow! I forgot that."

2 "That reminds me."

When I would write or re-read my memories, they would remind me of other memories.)

3 "What perfect timing before Christmas."

I get sentimental at Christmastime very year. this year is no exception. It was a wonderful time to focus on memories. It gave me a big warm fuzzy on the inside for the most part. (Note to self: Do this every year just before Christmas. It was worthwhile.)

3 "I'm stuck."

I would get stuck. I would get to the point I didn't know what to do, think, or write next.

4 "I'm tired." 

By the end of the day I was exhausted. I could not write another word until I took a break.

Yesterday went better, and worse, than I imagined at the start of the day. I do not know about all of you. Also, I had never done such an intense day of memory listing. Never. Not like that. The truth is I would do it all again--and will today. But, I learned a few things I will do differently today, which I will share with you in a moment.

MY STORYKEEPER ODYSSEY OF 2013

My goal for 2013 is to get all of my memories down on the page and in my journal. I also want to write about each of those memories and focus on writing a great deal on a few of them. I want to look back at these memories from today's eyes and see where I have come, where I am, where I am headed, and where I want to go from here. 

I want to look at how my experiences, memories, and stories have shaped who I am today. I also want to make sure I write the stories of others' in my lives as well--since their stories have undoubtedly shaped mine. 

TODAY'S JOURNALING RETREAT

Our goal of this 2-day journaling retreat is to get as many memories listed from our lives as possible in our journals. We want to try to write enough of a description that we can look back it a year from now and know what memory we referred to as we listed our memories. 

Make sure to get as many memories down on the page as possible, using the prompts described in this blog post:

http://storykeeper2121.blogspot.com/2012/12/the-storykeeper-odyssey-journaling.html

I also recommend doing as many of the prompts as possible, and a few of your own, so you don't get too tired, too bored, or get to the point you are tried and need a break. Keep it fresh.

If you do get stuck, pick one of the memories you have listed and write more about it. In fact, you might want to do a Memory Snapshot of the memory. 

MEMORY SNAPSHOT JOURNALING: 

It's okay to do steps 1-5 with just one memory. You can also just do #1-2 for one memory or #1-5. However, just remember how the more you do, the more you'll get out of this exercise. What you want to do exactly is up to you. 

~ 1 List in your journal at least 5 memories you have or haven't mentioned previously. Give each of the 5 memories a memory title, date (or at least approximate season or month as well as year), how old you were, a paragraph description, and how it's shaped your life.

~ 2 Choose 3 of the memories and write about a page about each. (Do one paragraph or 10 pages--depending on your time and your drive that day). List each of the 6 senses of: discernment/intuition, smell, sound, taste, touch, and sight regarding each memory. Also, answer who, what, where, when, why, how, and what-if questions in regards to that memory. (You may also choose to do a SOC about them as well.)

~ 3 Choose 2 of the memories which stand out to you the most and take 3-7 snapshots/photos of the memory with your imaginary camera. If the memory is crystal clear and you remember lots of detail, make it 7 snapshots. If it's foggy, make it 3. If it's in-between, you decide how many snapshots. Then, describe each in your journal. This will add about a paragraph per snapshot per memory.

~ 4 Take 1 snapshot from each memory and write it from the perspective of a stranger who's looking into the moment. Remember, the stranger doesn't know any of the people or events in the snapshot until the stranger sees this snapshot for the first time. Be descriptive.

~ 5 Plan on what future memories you might want to do this with later. 

IT'S THAT TIME

Shall we get started on our journaling retreat today? I will write more blog posts periodically to help us along. 

~ Stacy Duplease

Journaling Retreat: Checking In and Journaling Exercise

Journaling Retreat

We are over halfway through the day and should have quite the list of memories so far. 

JOURNALING EXERCISE:

* So, how is your memory list coming? Is it going better or worse than you imagined?

* How long is your list?

* What memories have surprised you?

* What have you forgotten and remembered?

* How have you compiled the list so far? What has worked and hasn't worked for you?

* Pick three memories to write a paragraph more about at this time.

* What memories have you made at different restaurants? List them.

* What foods and recipes remind you of memories? List the memories. 

TIPS

Have you tried to re-read your list as you go--to see if any other memories sre stirred up and remembered? 

Have you talked with someone else about your memories and see if they could help you jog your memories? 

MY PROGRESS

I have 20 pages so far of my list  But, I've been emailing back and forth with my mom who has reminded me of some memories and I have done the same with her.  Then, when I see her emails, it reminds me of something else. This has been helpful.

But, now I am getting sleepy and have slowed down with my list  So, I am going to try to switch it up for a bit and think of all my favorites--of anything and see what memories I can think of associated with each.