Senselessness

I know firsthand what it is like to have your family become national news. I also know what it's like to make national news because a loved one was shot and killed by evil. I also know what it's like to experience this before Christmas. 09 December 1998 is a date I will never forget. Those three things happened to my family on 09 December 1998. 

So, you see, Sandy Hook is terrible as it is. But, when you can relate to what they are going through (while not exactly because they are different incidents and we all grieve differently), it makes it even more personal.

What happened at Sandy Hook is the nightmare of nightmares. It shows the depravity of mankind and the power of evil. 

I know what it's like to question why--and to realize the answers will never come in this life. One day, though, if we make it to eternity and heaven, things will make more sense then. But, not until then. 

All the other questions play with your mind and plague you. 

The stupid things people do and say. "Time heals all wounds " is my personal favorite (not!). Looking back at Shar's death 14 years later, after Sandy Hook, the pain is just as raw and fresh as it was then. I just know how to deal with it differently now. My coping mechanisms have improved since that terrible day. I guess you could say that the pain has become a companion and friend, not an enemy.

I no longer fight the pain. I know to acknowledge it, feel it, and consciously work through it now. It's a skill I've learned since then.

Christmas is difficult afterward such a senseless tragedy, I will not lie. But, it's become even more meaningful to me. I know what it's like to lose someone you care for before Christmas. Murder makes it more difficult. But, it sure makes you hold onto who you have, what you have, and where you are--once you sort through the pain for a bit. 

That is why I am spending this week in mourning. It's because I know, somewhat, what the friends, families, and victims of the Sandy Hook Shooting are going through. It, too, has stirred up my own stuff. I will walk with them through their pain--because I know. I really do. 

JOURNALING EXERCISE:

What has the Sandy Hook Shootings stirred up in your own life? (After all, you do not have to experience something personally to imagine the pain someone else goes through--and this can stir up stuff in your own life.) 

~ Stacy Duplease

(Image Credit: Microsoft Images Online.)